


The Glad Game

by TheGayShipper (Miss_Vanderwaal)



Category: Pretty Little Liars
Genre: But it's essentially about Aria claiming her right to be a single mom, Gen, I guess you could call this "Anti-Ezra/Ezria"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-12-05 08:45:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11574561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Vanderwaal/pseuds/TheGayShipper
Summary: The last time she had played it was when she had been in Iceland with her family. But soon after that trip, Byron and Ella had gotten a divorce. “Alison’s” body had been found. A had happened. And Aria had started feeling too grown-up and too affected by life’s unfairness to continue on believing in the usefulness of the game.Although, now, the fact that Aria was sitting beside an orphan who apparently believed in the game still – the real Pollyanna – filled her heart with hope and her eyes with tears.





	The Glad Game

**Author's Note:**

> I did do my little research on adoption beforehand but, please, keep in mind that this is pure fiction and that I know absolutely nothing practical about adopting a child. 
> 
> That being said, Pollyanna, a book by Eleanor H. Porter (one of my favorites), is referenced here.

    The three-week long honeymoon was everything Aria had expected it would be; a cozy trip to the charming city of Verona, in Northern Italy – despite Hanna’s very persuasive suggestion of an at least two-month long Europe tour –, with modest, yet equally cozy, dinners, breakfasts in her and Ezra’s hotel bed, visits to vineyards and Juliet’s House and elderly Italian women telling them that they seemed to be the perfect couple. But then again, Aria thought, those nice ladies probably told that to every young couple of tourists who caught their attention.

   She and Ezra both knew some Italian, courtesy of college, and learning a bit more of it with him, so they wouldn’t depend too much on the broken English of most natives, took her mind off of the whole infertility thing for a refreshing while. Although, on some nights, a few nightmares did haunt Aria and when she woke up from those, she felt cold and alone, even with her husband’s arms around her.

   When the three weeks were over, Aria’s heart ached with homesickness. At the Philadelphia International Airport’s gate, she was surrounded and deliciously crushed by the arms of her four sisters. Tears of relief filled Aria’s eyes instantly. Those girls knew how to send anguish away like no one else on Earth did.

\- You were wrong, Ali – she told the blonde while holding her hand. – That wasn’t the end of something. It was just the beginning. And a beautiful one.

   Thanks to her best friends’ support and her very own words, Aria soon felt strong enough to restart thinking about having kids the nontraditional way.

   She had always been very certain about adopting rather than having a surrogate. She couldn’t possibly put that reason into words, though. It was just a feeling, maybe a gentle breath coming from up above, telling her what to do.

   Therefore, a few days after they arrived from Italy, she and Ezra went to visit Haven of the Angels, an almost centennary orphanage in Southern Rosewood – barely within town limits – that, in spite of maintaining its original name, didn’t have any religious influence over the children anymore.

   Even though Aria and Ezra were driving there only to learn more than what the internet would tell them about the process of adoption – meaning no life-changing decisions would be made that day –, the young woman’s heart was beating incredibly fast.

   The lady who supervised the visits warmly welcomed the couple and then guided them through the building, leading them firstly to one of the nurseries while asking them a series of informal questions, such as if it was their first time persuing adoption and what had made them start persuing it.

   Once they stepped into the room, they saw a young caregiver playing with a pair of toddlers on the floor. Aria couldn’t help but smile at that. Then, she and Ezra both looked at a baby boy wiggling in his crib. He was seemingly a few months younger than the toddlers on the floor and the supervisor encouraged Aria to pick him up. The young woman did so and her chest was immediately filled with warmth.

\- Hey, handsome – she said very softly with an ear-to-ear grin, adjusting the little boy in her arms. Big greenish eyes stared curiously at her and she wondered, nonjudgmentally, what could’ve been the reason behind someone giving that baby up.

   With Ezra’s palms protectively on her shoulders, Aria half listened to the supervisor talk while her attention was almost fully drawn to the baby in her arms – his tiny left hand was now wiggling in her hair as if it was some sort of mobile.

   It was funny how she  _still_ couldn’t picture herself being the mother of a baby, though. Well, finding out about her incapacity of giving birth had certainly made her think a lot about babies and about how she would’ve liked to  _have_ the option of making another human being inside of her, but, whenever she thought about her future children, she often imagined herself walking in a park while holding the hand of a sufficiently grown boy or girl. In all honesty, she thought much more about reading Shakespeare for Kids to a child old enough to be in pre school than about breastfeeding or changing diapers.

    _Perhaps I just need to be around babies a little bit more,_ she thought while the lady was still telling her and Ezra about a program they had called Become a Child’s Best Pal, in which adults could apply to make regular visits to the orphanage and get to know one or more of the over sixty kids living there. After a profile and a home evaluation, the adults were able to take the older kids to spend predetermined afternoons with them – that is if it turned out to be something that the children themselves would look forward to. As a whole, it was a way less formal process than actual foster care, given that no legal interference was required – unless, of course, a child ended up physically or emotionally hurt –, but it could evolve into foster care, which, in turn, could evolve into adoption, and it did, most of the times.

\- Is it possible for us to see the older kids today? – Aria couldn’t help but ask, sensing that Ezra was frowning behind her. They hadn’t talked about the age that they would like their future child to have, probably because he and everyone else around Aria simply assumed that they would adopt a newborn.

   The lady glanced at her watch and agreed with a friendly “sure!”, telling them that a group of older children, around two to three years old, was going to be taken to the courtyard in the back to play at any minute now.

   Within a short moment, Aria and Ezra were seated side by side on a bench in the courtyard. There were a couple of playhouses there, a slide, a swing set and a plastic rocking horse. The supervisor stood next to the seated couple, now informing them about how the kids who were around seven years old studied six hours a day there, just like children who attended regular schools did. Although, one more time, Aria wasn’t really listening.

   The young woman’s gaze fell on a girl who came through the back door of the building. She seemed to be a preteen – especially because of the black ripped jeans – and something told Aria that she was probably one of the oldest kids living there.

   The girl sat by herself on a bench close to the back door and opened the book that she had with her. Aria squinted to see if she could read the title of it. Pollyanna. She instantly smiled. The girl noticed that she was being watched and raised her head from the book, locking her eyes unhesitatingly on Aria’s and causing the young woman to feel a little flushed. The girl had a somewhat soft expression on her face, though, and it seemed like she wanted to smile.

   Aria gave her a timid smile first, but then they both turned their heads to the door because a couple of caregivers were guiding two short lines of young kids outside.

\- No pushing! – a man who seemed to be in his twenties said to the kids who were already running eagerly across the courtyard.

  The fuss immediately put a wide smile on Aria’s face. She eyed a little blonde boy who pulled a toy dumper truck by a strand of twine behind him, walking slowly, unlike the other kids. He kept crouching down to pick up leaves from the ground and exam them carefully. Then, he put the ones he thought were pretty inside his truck container.

   The little boy approached the bench Aria and Ezra were sitting on, yet with his eyes pinned on the grass. Feeling her chest fully warm once again, Aria picked up a leaf that was lying between her feet and offered it to the boy, who accepted it silently. Both her and Ezra chuckled softly and the man extended an arm to fondly touch the top of the little boy’s head. Aria appreciated the gesture, although she knew that Ezra was probably forcing himself to do that, given he had always been very shy around kids.

   Aria glanced ahead at the sandbox just below the slide. The little blonde boy was sitting on the edge of it and the girl, who Aria had seen a moment ago holding a copy of Pollyanna, was there as well.

\- Hey, Cole – the girl leaned in to kiss the little boy’s cheek. – Whatcha doing?

   Aria felt an “aaw” in her throat while watching that. Ezra touched one of her knees.

\- Go on – he said, tilting his head towards the sandbox. – You know you wanna try and be their best pal.

   Aria smiled, excitedly, and glanced up at the supervisor who was still standing next to them, to silently ask for her permission.

\- It’s alright – the lady nodded. – They’re normally very at ease near new adult faces.

   Aria then took a deep breath and started walking towards the sandbox, not really sure of what she was doing. The girl was helping the little boy build a sand castle that had towers with green flags on top, so she didn’t see Aria sitting beside her.

\- Hi, there – the young woman greeted a bit jittery, although not forgetting to put a sweet smile on her face.

   The girl turned to Aria with the same soft-wanting-to-smile expression from just before on her face. She had light brown skin and curly black hair that cascaded over her shoulders. If Aria were to guess, she would say that the girl was about eleven or twelve.

\- Hi – she replied in a light tone. Again, her eyes locked unhesitatingly on Aria’s. She definitely didn’t seem intimidated by a stranger’s presence.

   Aria panicked for a beat, not knowing how to actually start a conversation, but then she glanced down at the girl’s lap. The book was there and it soothed her instantly.

\- You’ve made a great choice – she commented, pointing to the book.

   The girl finally gave her a real smile.

\- Thanks. I know. It’s my third time reading it.

   The information allowed Aria to relax even more.

\- I assume you’re an optimistic, then.

   The girl shrugged slightly.

\- Well, I do play The Glad Game sometimes.

  Aria smiled in a discrete awe. The Glad Game – trying to find something good in every bad situation.  _That_ was a game worth dedicating hours and hours to. She used to play it when she was younger. Actually, the last time she had played it was when she had been in Iceland with her family. Back then, she had thought that the crisis in her parents’ marriage was something for her to be glad about because that crisis had made them fly across the Atlantic Ocean and reconnect while skiing together. But soon after that trip, Byron and Ella had gotten a divorce. “Alison’s” body had been found. A had happened. And Aria had started feeling too grown-up and too affected by life’s unfairness to continue on believing in the usefulness of the game.

   Although, now, the fact that Aria was sitting beside an orphan who apparently believed in the game still – the real Pollyanna – filled her heart with hope and her eyes with tears.

\- I’m Aria – she blinked her emotion away, holding out her hand, and glanced over at Ezra, who was still politely chatting with the supervisor. – And that guy over there is my husband Ezra.

   The girl quickly followed Aria’s gaze and then shook the woman’s hand.

\- I’m Katherine, but everyone around here calls me Kat.

   Aria took that information in and pronounced her next words carefully.

\- May I be a part of everyone?

   Katherine nodded while another smile tugged at one corner of her lips.

\- Well, then, nice to meet you, Kat.

   They spent a short moment in silence. Kat took one more quick look at Ezra.

\- Are you guys looking for a kid?

   Aria couldn’t help but widen her eyes a little. The girl’s tone was casual as if she worked at a grocery store and was asking “are you looking for tomatoes?”.

\- I can’t give birth to my own kids – Aria explained after a while, again feeling a bit flushed –, so, yeah, we’re thinking about adopting. 

\- Oh – Kat said, quietly. – I’m sorry. Not about you adopting, but about the other thing.

   Aria gave her a small yet thankful smile.

\- It’s okay. Thank you, though.

   They spent another short moment in silence and Aria opened her mouth to ask Kat something else about the world of Pollyanna, maybe if she liked the Disney version of it, with Haley Mills, but a lady, who was pushing a little girl on one of the swings, spoke first.

\- Kat, have you done your homework?

\- Yes – the girl answered loud and clearly after discreetly rolling her eyes.

\- I should know better than to believe you.

   The lady didn’t sound mad, just spoke as if Kat was the typical troublemaker. The girl smirked more so to herself and bit her lower lip as if she was proud of said title.

-  _Have_ you done your homework? – Aria asked in an amused tone.

   Kat put a hand defensively on her chest.

\- Hey, I am a very trustworthy person – although she wasn’t confirming or denying anything, which made Aria chuckle. – The thing is that the older kids can’t, technically, be here when they bring the babies, but they know me and they know I love babies, so…

\- I ain’t no baby – the little blonde boy, who seemed to be about two years old, claimed, taking his eyes off his sand construction for a moment.

\- Yes, you are – Kat said calmly, turning to him. – You still have baby pinchable cheeks.

   Aria laughed one more time. She couldn’t help but think that, if Kat met Emily and Alison’s twins, she’d go crazy. Even people who weren’t baby lovers went crazy over them.

\- This is Cole, by the way – Kat introduced the little boy to Aria. – He is my very best friend in the entire world, aren’t you, Cole?

   Cole nodded, still pretty focused on his work, and Aria’s heart melted all over again. It was a given that kids living together in that kind of facility would end up developing some sense of siblinghood, but Aria hadn’t prepared herself to witness it.

   Therefore, before Aria knew it, she was helping the two of them build their sand castle. Time flew by and her heart ached a little once the couple of caregivers began lining the kids up again so they could go back inside the building.

   Ezra rose to his feet as well and eyed Aria. His eyes said “visiting hours are over” and Aria got up from her somewhat uncomfortable seat on the edge of the sandbox. She couldn’t help but feel disappointed by the fact that Ezra hadn’t tried to walk up there and say hi.

   She shook that feeling away and said goodbye to Cole and Kat. The girl leaned against Aria for a quick – and surprising – hug.

\- Good luck. You know, with your future kid and all.

   Aria smiled at that and hugged Kat back with the feeling of having, once again, slightly teary eyes.

\- Thank you very much, sweetie – she whispered, instinctively pressing a kiss onto the girl’s forehead.

   Once Aria was back in the car with Ezra, she told him everything she had learned about the two kids in that short amount of time, focusing on the older one.

\- I like her – she said with a grin, aware that her eyes were probably shining with excitement. – I mean I  _really_ like her.

   Ezra took his eyes off the road for only a second to look at her.

\- Yeah, she seems sweet – he smiled. His tone wasn’t nonchalant exactly, but it was something somewhat close to that. It didn’t fail to leave a bad tingling in Aria’s stomach.

\- Ezra, what do you think about us adopting an older kid? – she carefully asked, jittery again, feeling like she was stepping on egg shells. – Older like Katherine?

   Ezra looked at her for a longer moment, seeming to finally be more interested in what she was saying, if not a little concerned about it.

\- Honey, you know I’m with you on whatever you decide.

    _Whatever you decide._ It made the bad tingling in Aria’s stomach evolve into slight nausea.

\- Ezra… we’re not talking about our honeymoon anymore. You can’t just leave it for me to decide what child comes into our lives as if you’re asking me what Italian restaurant I’d like us to go to. This will affect us forever. I want you to have a say in it.

   Ezra took a deep breath and tightened his grip on the steering wheel a little.

\- I just… adopting an older child can be a handful. You have at least some idea about that. You read all those online forums with me. Some of them have trouble adjusting to new homes, some resist when it comes to following rules. They have their own worldwiews already; their traumas, most of the times. Besides, I thought you’d want our child to remember us as their very first parents.

   Aria had to fight back the urge of telling Ezra to stop talking. The nausea grew a bit more in her stomach. She thought of Malcolm – the little boy whose mother (Ezra’s ex-girlfriend) had made Ezra believe, for a short amount of time, that they had that child together because she didn’t remember the face nor the name of the real father – and of how Ezra used to feel tense around him, as if he had known all along that the boy wasn’t his real child – and as if, therefore, Ezra didn’t care enough about connecting with him. Aria had babysat Malcolm quite a few times and, honestly, that whole story had made Malcolm grow more attached to her than to Ezra.

\- This is… not the reason why I’m thinking about adopting, Ezra – Aria said, trying her hardest to keep her tone smooth. – I don’t think it’s the reason why  _anyone_ thinks about adopting. We shouldn’t want a newborn just so we can mold them into a certain shape. Plus, I care about us being our child’s parents. It doesn’t matter to me if we’re not gonna be remembered by them as their first ones.

   Ezra stopped at a red light, seeming embarrassed, and took Aria’s left hand in his right one.

\- I know – he softly said, then kissing the back of Aria’s hand. – You’re right. I’m sorry.

   That gesture and those words didn’t make Aria feel any better. Those were the words people usually said when they didn’t want to go into a longer and possibly heated discussion with a loved one.

   She and Ezra didn’t talk about that whole thing during the entire drive back home. They also didn’t talk about it during the rest of that day nor during the day after it.

   Therefore, Aria decided to go visit Kat for a second time a few days later, on her own, while Ezra was out of town.

   She hadn’t schedualed a visit, like she and Ezra had done before, so she was scared that they wouldn’t let her in, but, luckily, the same lady who had supervised her last visit saw her at the reception counter.

\- It’s alright – the lady said, just as friendly as before, guiding Aria up a staircase. – I saw the way you two were bondind the first time you were here. I’m sure she’ll be glad to see you.

    _Glad._  Aria smiled when she heard the word, certain that, from now on, she wouldn’t be able to hear it without immediately thinking of The Glad Game.

   The lady left Aria at the doorway of a music classroom. A few kids, who were apparently the same age Kat was, were heading out, recorders in hand. The curly haired girl stayed there, though, seated before a music stand and trying to hit all the right notes of Ode to Joy. Once again, Aria couldn’t help but smile, wondering if everything about that girl would start reminding her of the word  _glad._

   She started clapping once Kat played the last note, making the girl’s eyes drift instantly from the sheet music to her.

-  _That_ was pretty awesome – Aria said, leaning against the door frame.

   Kat grinned, which Aria took as an invite to step into the room and sit on the bench that was in front of a digital piano.

\- What are you doing here? – the girl asked, excitedly, and put her recorder down.

\- Oh, I was just in the neighborhood – Aria casually answered, not worrying about the fact that Kat would probably not believe that – and then I thought: why not visit a fellow Glad Gamer?

   Kat chuckled timidly at that.

\- Where’s your husband? – she gazed at the door.

   Aria’s cheeks suddenly got warm. She lowered her own gaze to the white parquet floor, feeling a bit embarrassed. She was doing something behind Ezra’s back. It felt somewhat like cheating.

\- He had to do some work stuff – she answered slowly.

   Kat nodded, getting up from her chair and sitting on the piano bench beside Aria.

\- What does he do?

\- He’s a writer. Like me.

   The girl’s brown eyes gleamed.

\- Really?! What do you guys write about?

\- Well, let’s say he takes a few dark facts and turns them into even darker stories. I, on the other hand, am a proud fan of the sugarcoated romances. I write poetry and short stories, mostly – Aria took a quick breath and lightened up her tone. –  _But_ music has a big part of my heart, too. That’s why I think this classroom is so cool.

   She looked around the rather spacious room. A few chairs and music stands were lined up horizontally in the middle of it, facing a white board on the wall. There were a couple of guitars in the back, on their respective stands, and an electronic drum set. The piano itself was in the front right corner of the room. There were various posters on the walls, one of those being  _10 reasons why studying music makes you smarter._

\- Yeah, it is – Kat looked around as well. – I’m so glad we have a place like this here. I’d spend whole days in here if I could. I can’t play anything except a bit of recorder but I like messing around with the other instruments anyway – she paused to lift a cheerfully curious gaze up to Aria. – Do you play anything, by the way?

   The young woman chuckled and her cheeks got warm again, but this time because of something far better than embarrassment. She spun around in her seat to face the piano.

\- I’ve always  _loved_ beauties like this one – Aria said, sliding her trembling-with-eagerness fingers across the keys, but without actually playing any at first. – I’m sure I’m a little rusty, but…

   She could feel Kat’s eyes on her, just as full of excitement, saying “please, play me something”. So Aria played a bit of  _Fly Me to the Moon_. She missed a few notes, mostly because of a good kind of nervousness, but she hadn’t touched a piano in a few years so it felt liberating anyway.

\- Now,  _that_ is what I call pretty awesome – Kat said, poiting to the keys. – Do you know the whole thing?

   Once again, those pleading kitty eyes were on Aria, but instead of flustering her, they gave her the guts that she needed to play the entire song, this time stepping in with her voice as well. Kat’s mouth was agape as soon as Aria started singing and, by the time the woman reached the chorus of the song, she was singing at the top of her lungs, blissfully.

  The summer after sophomore year of college had been the very last time Aria had done something like that. Emily, Hanna, Spencer and Alison had all gone to Cambridge, Massachusetts, to hear her read one of her short stories at open mic night on Harvard Square. Later that night, they had gone to a bar, in which there was a shabby piano in a corner. Aria was already tipsy, as well as the girls, when she decided to play-slash-sing that same song and, before she knew it, her drunken sisters were singing and giggling along with her.

   That song was, in fact, one of the first ones that she and Ezra had danced to as an official couple, years and years ago, but Aria hadn’t thought of Ezra back then, at the bar, just as she wasn’t thinking of Ezra now, with Kat by her side. She did think about the fact that she  _wasn’t_ thinking about him, though, which made her realize that she was playing the game without even noticing it – she was  _glad_ that Ezra hadn’t come with her because, if he had, Aria wouldn’t be feeling as comfortable doing what she was currently doing.

\- What the hell are you doing in a town like Rosewood? – Kat asked, wide-eyed, as Aria’s hands moved away from the keys. – You… you should be on Broadway!

   Aria threw her head back in a laugh. 

\- Thank you, sometimes I think so too – she joked.

   Their conversation continued for several minutes and Aria was loving to learn more about that girl; Katherine Griffin, who was actually ten years old but liked when people assumed she was older. She hadn’t ever liked playing with dolls. She had only one rag doll, actually, which had been a gift from her first foster grandmother when she was three years old. She loved skateboarding, though, and the skateboard that she kept under her bed had been a gift from a foster older brother when she was eight.

\- You’re really tiny for a twenty-five year old – Kat commented at one point, making Aria laugh one more time, as if she was chatting with a best friend.

\- Well, maybe  _you’re_ too big for a ten year old.

\- Yeah, I’ve been told – and suddenly Kat sounded a bit bummed out. – Sometimes I do wish I was smaller or looked younger, or both.

   It was implicit that  _that_ had to do with being adopted faster. One more time, it hit Aria: most people were  _always_ after newborns or really young children.

\- Nah, I wouldn’t wish that – she tried to keep speaking in a light tone. – You should be glad you seem older because when you look permanently like a child, your friends make fun of you and your dad keeps calling you pooky bear until after you get a job.

   Aria bit on her bottom lip after she gave Kat that second example, wishing she could take it back.

\- You can say “mom” and “dad” in front of me, Aria – the girl said as if it were no big deal at all. – Those words don’t suddenly make me wanna cry.

   Aria smiled, amazed at how mature that girl seemed to be. Not growing up with official parents perhaps did that to children.

   Then, they talked about their favorite bands and singers. Aria mentioned Frank Sinatra, Avicii, Ed Sheeran and Elvis Presley, because of her parents. Kat basically praised Shakira and walked over to her music stand to grab a smartphone that was there acting like a paperweight.

\- You have a phone? – Aria frowned.

\- Yeah – Kat shrugged, one more time as if it were no big deal. – I got it from Santa Claus.

   It was certainly weird hearing those two words coming out of that girl’s mouth.

 - Well, there’s a guy who comes here every Christmas dressed like Santa Claus – Kat added. – He brings donated toys in a big red sack and  _this_ was in the sack last Christmas. At first everyone thought someone had dropped it there by accident, but that ended up not being the case, so I took it. It doesn’t have a SIM card but I put all my gems in it.

   Aria laughed briefly as she watched the girl search through her playlist for a certain song of the Colombian artist.

\- How, though? Do you guys have internet here?

\- Limited access in the library for school stuff. But, hey, a girl can learn how to hack into YouTube and, therefore, YouTube MP3 Converter.

   With that, Kat gave Aria an one-shoulder shrugg and the young woman bursted into giggles.  _How much more awesome can this girl get?_

   They soon danced carelessly to Whenever, Wherever and, while Aria was spinning Kat around by one hand, the lyrics in the chorus caught her attention.

 

_Whenever, wherever_

_We’re meant to be together_

_I’ll be there and you’ll be near_

_And that’s the deal, my dear_

_Thereover, hereunder_

_You got me head over heels_

_There’s nothing left to fear_

_If you really feel the way I feel_

 

   If the circumstances were different, Aria wouldn’t, ever, have thought that those lyrics could have a meaning other than a romantic one. Now, though, she felt that a whole new type of love was being described by those words.

\- You’re a good dancer, for a writer – Kat joked, sitting beside Aria on the piano bench again once the song was over.

   Aria gave her a playful nudge, laughing internally.

\- Thanks.

\- Now, seriously – Kat eyed her with a soft smile on her face. – You’re really fun. I hope I can see you more.

   Those words made Aria’s heart beat as if she had just run a marathon. Therefore, on her way out of the building, she stopped by the reception counter and applied to the Become a Child’s Best Pal program.

   On their very first afternoon out, Aria took Kat to a skatepark in Philly. They had agreed priorly that Kat would try to teach Aria how to ride a skateboard, but, unsurprisingly, it didn’t work very well. After falling three times, Aria bent her bottom lip and said “please, no more”. She wasn’t even virtually upset, though. There was no way she could be, not while she was holding Kat’s hand as they strolled to an ice cream place. It was as if Aria was having some kind of déjà-vu. Ezra was barely mentioned.

   On their second afternoon out, Aria took Kat to a meet-and-greet at Alison and Emily’s house. Hanna and Spencer were also there and there were plates of finger food – which included one of donuts with honey on top (Kat’s favorite edible in the world) – on the coffee table. On that particular afternoon, Aria made a mental note to thank her sisters for deciding not to leave Rosewood.

   Spencer pulled Aria aside to talk then, while the shorter brunette was pouring a bag of microwave popcorn into a large bowl in Alison and Emily’s kitchen. The couple was in the living room with Hanna, the twins and a frienzied Kat.

\- So, are they getting along? Kat and Ezra? – Spencer’s tone was low and she sounded a bit concerned. She obviously remembered how the man had felt when a kid, who wasn’t his, had come out of nowhere into his life years ago.

    Aria gently shook her head, feeling nothing but an urge of being honest with Spencer.

\- I really don’t wanna think about Ezra’s current behavior right now, Spence.

   Spencer stayed quiet for a short moment and she seemed to know the answer to what she was about to ask.

\- Okay, but just tell me something: have you ever thought of doing this on your own?

   Spencer brought up the possibility straightforwardly, so much so that it scared Aria a little. Although, her words didn’t have that “are you nuts?” tone to them. Quite on the contrary. Spencer made the possibility sound incredibly viable.

\- I don’t know. All I know is that Ezra seems fine with not getting involved and that Kat and I are fine with not having him involved.

   Spencer merely nodded and, when Aria started heading to the living room with the bowl of popcorn in her hands, she fondly touched her shoulder.

\- There’s no such thing as “on your own”, by the way – Spencer said, still very softly. – You’ll always have us. For anything and everything. But if you end up deciding to do this without Ezra, please, know that I think you very much can. Remember: you’re little, but you’re big. You’re  _so_ big. In fact, I don’t think you’ve ever looked bigger to me than you did just now, with her on your lap.

   Aria smiled, leaning against Spencer for an one-armed hug and getting out of it truly empowered.

\- Thanks, babe.

   On their third afternoon out, Aria decided to give Ezra a shot – in spite of the fact that he still hadn’t expressed any eagerness whatsoever in regards of meeting the girl – by taking Kat to their loft.

\- Oh, there’s the famous Miss Katherine Griffin – the man smiled, moving his laptop from his lap to a spot beside him on the couch and getting up to give Kat a hug.

   He had been writing a lot lately. “Nothing solid yet, just drabbles”, he had told Aria a few times – that is, until she got tired of asking. Although, that hug between the two of them made Aria feel a bit refreshed.

\- I’ve heard quite a lot about you – he said, still smiling a polite and charming smile, the same one that had smitten Aria an apparent lifetime ago.

\- I’ve heard a lot about you too, Mr. Fitz – Kat looked up at him, grinning, eyes gleaming as if she was finally meeting her favorite author.

   Ezra waved his hand dismissively.

\- Nah, forget Mr. Fitz. I’ll call you Kat and you call me Ezra, deal?

   The girl’s grin widened even more.

\- Deal! – they shook hands and Aria was legitimately impressed. Proud.

   That pride in her eyes didn’t last for very long, though, because Ezra soon claimed that it was storming in his brian, so he grabbed his laptop and went to their bedroom to write after laying an apologetical kiss onto Aria’s lips.

\- He doesn’t talk much, does he? – Kat asked, visibly bummed out, sitting on one of the kitchen counter stools.

   Aria, whose heart was throbbing with sorrow and a bit of anger, walked over to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of root beer, handing it to Kat.

\- He’s just shy, sweetie, that’s all – she shrugged weakly, not looking into the girl’s eyes because, if she did that, she would most likely start crying.

   On that same night, while Ezra started undressing to get into bed with her, Aria felt a lump in her throat, which she had to get rid of, otherwise she wouldn’t be able to sleep.

\- Do you feel uncomfortable around her? – she cut to the chase because she hated both hearing and saying “we have to talk”.

   Ezra took long to respond. He sat on the bed with only his jeans on and raised both of his eyebrows, which meant he was struggling to choose his words.

\- I just think that, maybe, you’re moving too fast with her. I mean, what if it doesn’t work out? It would only be one more trauma to that girl. We don’t want that, do we?

   Aria shook her head to herself immediately. It wasn’t that what he was worried about, and even if it were, she  _wouldn’t_ let anything go wrong.

\- Ezra, we swore. Once we were up at that altar, we swore there wouldn’t be anymore secrets between us. Please. I need you to be honest with me.

   He moved a bit closer to her on the bed. The look in his eyes told her that he was hurting as well.

\- I know why you brought her home today. I see the way your eyes gleam whenever you talk about her. You love that girl already and you’re gonna, eventually, start seeing her as your daughter. That’s beautiful. But I’m afraid I won’t be able to do the same thing and it hurts me saying that because I want to be able to do anything and everything for you.  

   By the time Ezra concluded, Aria’s eyes were flooded with tears. She knew that they had just hit a wall which they simply wouldn’t be able to break down. There was so much she wanted to say.  _You don’t have to do anything and everything for me. I don’t wanna force you to be someone you’re not. I’m **glad**  you finally told me this._

   Instead, she just ran her fingers through his hair in a gentle caress and allowed him to kiss her, and that kiss felt like it would be one of their last ones.

   They agreed to get a divorce a few weeks later. Ezra wanted Aria to be the one to stay in the loft but, for various reasons, Aria declined the offer and moved in with Ella.

   Kat asked about Ezra on her first visit to Aria’s old home. They hadn’t seen each other in over a month.

\- It didn’t work out – Aria answered in a soft tone, sitting by the girl’s left side on her mother’s couch.

   There was nothing soft about Kat’s expression, though. The look in her eyes was uncharacteristically sad and she kept staring ahead, at nothing in particular.

\- Because of me?

\- Oh, no, baby – Aria said as her right hand stroked Kat’s back. – Look, I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but we just realized that we wanted different things, that’s all.

   Kat finally seemed to relax, leaning against Aria’s side.

\- I thought that you weren’t gonna show up anymore – she said, yet sounding a little vague –, but I’m glad I was wrong.

   Aria’s heart ached given the first half of that sentence, but the relief that the second half of it gave her was endlessly greater. She smiled.

\- Listen, my Pollyanna – she put two fingers under Kat’s chin and delicately tilted the girl’s face towards her. – I’m sorry about disappearing on you like that. But I want you to know that it will never happen again. I plan on staying with you forever, if you’ll have me.

\- Forever? – a smirk was already tugging at one corner of the girl’s lips – With you telling me not to skate inside the house and also telling me what time I should go to bed? That type of forever?

\- That’s the deal, my dear – Aria couldn’t help but reference, and Kat giggled, wrapping her arms around Aria’s midsection.

\- I’d like that.

   They spent a moment like that, wrapped around one another, and Aria thought about how easy it was to think of that girl as her daughter nowadays, easier than it was thinking of herself as a mom, for some reason.

\- I wanna say something… – Kat suddenly spoke, faltering, into the quietness of the house – but then I don’t because it’s really, really,  _really_ selfish.

\- Hey – Aria looked down at the girl and cupped one of her cheeks –, it’s me. I guess I’m way past your best pal now. You can tell me anything.

   Kat lowered her head and closed her eyes for a second, as if she was truly scared of her own words.

\- Part of me is glad that you can’t give birth to your own children – she began, voice heavy with emotion – because, if you could, I wouldn’t’ve ever met you. And I’m sorry, that sounds so horrible!

   With that, Kat hid her face in her hands and Aria’s eyes filled with happy realization tears. It was amazing finding something that made her believe in the “everything happens for a reason” theory. She was supposed to raise that child on her own – or simply without Ezra, as Spencer had put it.  _That_ was exactly where she supposed to be.

\- It’s definitely not horrible – Aria said ever so softly, moving Kat’s hands away from her face. – It’s true. It  _is_ something to be glad about – she kissed the girl’s forehead, and  _that_ was the precise moment when she  _knew_  that she didn’t just had a child, but that she was a mother as well. – I love you, sweetheart.

   Kat went back to wrapping herself around Aria. Tighter. As if she had come to the exact same realization; that she not only was the child of someone, but that she finally had a mother. Not a foster mother. A forever mother. And the words slipped easily from her lips.

\- I love you, Mom.

   Aria had felt it coming, but then again, who on Earth would be ready to hear something like that for the first time? The tears ran across her cheeks and she didn't try to hold them back or wipe them away. 

\- Come on - she pulled Kat up to her feet by one hand after a while and headed outside with her. - Let's go get a SIM card for that phone of yours. 


End file.
